As I sit here today pondering what it is I should do, I see so many other variables that play into the situation of what could be. Trying to steer clear of crazy thoughts like, well, I won’t say what I was going to for fear it may incriminate me down the line.
I don’t really want to go to Mesa but it looks like I may have to. It’s either that or go back to Denver which I am not ready for because I have all this stuff at mom’s now and I don’t plan on coming back out here once I leave to go to Denver.
Going to a domestic violence shelter is not what my first choice would be but it looks like it might be the best option here. However this puts me back on the grid which I was doing my best to disappear off of.
They have a bus system in Mesa so I can get around if necessary and that is always helpful. I can’t believe Apache Junction has no transit system for the public. Actually scratch that, this place reminds me of Commerce City, Colorado. There are a lot of people here high on methamphetamines so they are out of their mind most of the time or just play like they are ( acting more of a twack than they really are for other purposes ) and I find women and children’s belongings discarded on the side of the road or in weird random places just like Commerce City. How sad!
Things have gotten so difficult just to live it’s amazing to me how it all used to seem so easy when I was drinking, I have tried to start again but my therapy was so good it never took. Not to mention I got judged for being an alcoholic but at least I was able to function.